Edges

Somehow the past remains at the edges
lapping against the mind as waves upon the sand
taking a bit here and a bit there leaving no trace
and yet you feel it there a shadow and a thought

You believe that you’ve moved beyond the past
that regret is not something you live with
but at the edges its cold and icy fingers reach in
and you can barely feel it

You work to stay in the center avoiding the dark edges
keeping the shadows of what was out of the what is
pushing down the memories pushing back on the waves
always reconstructing the wall

The memories they whisper they brush at your mind
each one growing fainter and yet the icy touch still there
time to push back move away towards the center
live as if they don’t exist

Shadows

And lo though I walk through this life with no regret

the shadows they follow me still

the past is gone but unforgotten as yet

it lingers at the corners against my will

 

And lo though I walk knowing it is better now

the stitches of the wounds remain

to completely erase rewind forget somehow

these things I cannot yet attain

 

And lo though I walk in love and light

the darkness that once was creeps in and out

even though I resist with all my might

just  a little twinge just a little doubt

 

And lo though I walk renewed and stronger

the shadows remain just out of reach

wishing them gone to be here no longer

but there are still lessons they must teach

Rushing

All the while I thought I had put it all away

the memories of what was left as they lay

with just one look there they came rushing back again

taking my heart back to remember when

So hard I’ve tried to push away at the edges of my soul

slowly piecing back together the parts to make a whole

and rushing back now overwhelmed unable to make them stop

like raindrops of memory drop by drop by drop

Like a river it overtakes me and I can no longer breathe it seems

invading every thought awake even into my dreams

things I thought were long since gone are back just as real

if I could only find a way to no longer feel

Rushing waters of memory wash over my soul as waves upon the sand

battering on every emotion so hard now just to stand

slowly I push back until the water I no longer feel

left once again to wonder what was and wasn’t real

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